“Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing,
Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before;
But the silence was unbroken, and the darkness gave no token.”—The Raven - Edgar Allan Poe (via callitalullabyx)
1) ***** : dont lie to me. it hurts so much. you’re lying and expecting me to be all open and honest. you could be a lot more sincere. i’m not like you. you’re not like me. you should think before you talk
viki: i’m sorry. you should be sorry. i dont have a clue. maybe i’ve done you wrong
dad: i am terribly sorry for making you worry about me. i’m so worried about you.
1. Three things I want to say to three different people. 2. One of my insecurities. 3. What turns me on. 4. One of my bad habits. 5. Who I wish I could be. 6. Where I want to be right now. 7. The last thing I ate. 8. Sexiest person that comes to my mind immediately. 9. What song I’m currently listening to. 10. The last time I cried and why. 11. Something I’m excited about. 12. 5 things I like about myself and 5 things I dislike about myself. 13. Three things I want right now.
not too well. although i dont know what would classify as “doing well” i guess, at least, getting somewhere. diminishing, shrinking it is hell anyway and even more horrendous when i’m sitting here waiting, immersing in self loathing and disgust, waiting for something to change, waiting to feel something. this emptiness is so much easier to bear when you’re physically empty everything feels so terribly wrong and is just inciting the inner war
“But when it came right down to it, the skin of my wrist looked so white and defenseless that I couldn’t do it. It was as if what I wanted to kill wasn’t in that skin or the thin blue pulse that jumped under my thumb, but somewhere else, deeper, more secret, and a whole lot harder to get.”—The Bell Jar (via sickly-thin)
I can't even begin to imagine how hard life is for you, it must be a constant struggle and for that I admire you. I really hope that you get better and one day can say that you have recovered. Best wishes, Laura. <3